The weather here has been crazy. The mornings are insanely chilly, and then by noon, it's scorching hot outside (or as scorching hot as it gets here in the UK, anyway! nothing compared to the weather back home right now, I'm sure). The evenings are warm, but bearable, but because of all the heat that usually builds up in the house during the day (and because the british don't believe in air conditioning), I sleep with nearly all the windows open upstairs. The last few nights when I get into bed, I have the covers completely kicked off (otherwise I break into a sweat), and instead of my usual t-shirt, I'm in a tank top because it's just so damn hot. It never fails that sometime in the middle of the night, I wake up freezing, so much so that my teeth are chattering, and I jump out of bed, shut all of the windows and pile on another layer or two of clothing before I jump back into bed and pull the covers completely over my head to try to keep as much warmth in as possible. It's been a ridiculous cycle that has been repeating all week, and while I enjoy the sunshine and the lack of rain, I'm at the point where I wish the weather would just make a choice. Is it fall? Is it summer? You can't have it both ways, mother nature! CHOOSE, BITCH!
This morning when I woke up freezing, I instinctually rolled over to face Gene's side of the bed, fully expecting a warm body to be there to cuddle up with, and when he wasn't there, my brain initially thought "what is he doing up already?" - It took probably a full minute before I remembered that he was gone and won't be back for another 5 1/2 months. This happens pretty frequently when I'm half asleep. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking he's just downstairs or that he hasn't made it home from work yet. It's bizarre, but sometimes it's a little bit comforting.
He's been gone for a full two weeks, but it seems like he's been gone for months. On the scale of how people deal with deployment ("great" being the best and "sniveling, codependent mess" being the worst) I think I fall nearer to the "great" side, but I have my moments. I do great during the day when I'm busy or at work, but then I come home and it's quiet (aside from the sounds of the dogs going nuts, running laps around the house) and I do get a little sad. I get to talk to him pretty much every night (on google messenger), but I've only talked to him once on the phone since he left. I don't feel much like cooking because the thought of wasting such a significant amount of food (since everything I cook is only appropriate for multiple people, and I'm not really the best at eating leftovers) doesn't appeal to me, so my diet for the last two weeks (aside from the few meals I've had out) consists mainly of cereal, toasts, sandwiches, salads, eggs, and tomatoes - LOTS of tomatoes. I do imagine that soon I'll tire of this, so I've found a couple of books full of recipes for one person that I'm going to order. Obviously because I'm only one person and I'm not cooking much, it means less dirty dishes to clean - I was amazed when I loaded my dishwasher for the first time in an entire week yesterday. I usually have to do a load every day....I spend a lot of time watching t.v. or sitting in front of the computer, and I spend an obscene amount of time cleaning. Gene always made fun of me for dusting things, and now it's just become an obsession. If I'm bored, I'll get the duster out and just dust anything and everything that may or may not need dusting.....I guess that's a bright side of the deployment....
5 months, 2 weeks to go, y'all!
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